After All
by excessivefangirling
Summary: Harry has witnessed Ruth's death. He is alone, devastated, but has decided to return to work anyways. Picks up after Harry answers the phone at the end of the last episode of Spooks.
1. Chapter 1

He picked up the phone… With all of the heartache he felt, he recognized that he needed to continue in his work. If he didn't, he knew he would surely loose his mind. On the other line was heavy breathing along with a sigh of relief. His heart sank. He knew. He could sense it. Hear it in the breathing. The sighs he was all too familiar with.

"Harry" The soft female voice said.

It was her. It was Ruth. His mind began to race and he couldn't help the tears that formed in the corners of his eyes.

"I know you won't believe this. You can't. But you must. Harry, it's me... Ruth."

"I know" he replied.

"Bu-"

He interrupted her, "I knew the second I heard you. My first thought was that it is impossible, and then I remembered my field of work." A soft chuckle leaves both of them, "Ruth, where are you?" Harry asks almost hesitantly.

"Harry you can't, not this soon."

Using everything he could get his hands on he tried to track her call. Oh, but she's good. She knew he would do this. Not knowing who else to turn to he picked up his cell phone and sent a short message to Malcolm "Thames House, as soon as you can. I need your help. –HP"

"I don't care what it takes, I am coming to you. I love you. I have loved you for far too long, and I miss you far too much to let you get away from me. They want to get rid of me anyways, this is our chance." He knew she wouldn't budge on this, she never does. He was continuing the conversation anyway, stalling her. "We can get a cottage away from here. Away from this. We can be together."

Somehow in that instant Malcolm had arrived. He would be more curious as to how he could have possibly arrived so quickly had he not been so caught up in trying to pinpoint Ruth's whereabouts.

"Harry you know as well as I do that…" she continued to explain herself but he was paying no attention. Instead he was explaining the situation to Malcolm, who just arrived, with hand gestures and the quietest of whispers so that she would not suspect anything.

"I know Ruth, I know." Malcolm had tracked her down at this point, blocking the signal of any bug that may have been present on either line. Malcolm understood the urgency of the situation. He has worked alongside Harry long enough to understand the heartache he is feeling. He was there when she had turned him down, when she left, and he was there to see the emotions go flooding back to Harry when she stepped back into that office, years later.

She was located in the next city over near the bus headed toward Cheltenham. Malcolm rushed him out of the office as Harry attempted to thank him, but he felt that thanks were not needed. Harry just needed to find Ruth and find her fast.


	2. Chapter 2

As she hung up the phone she lingered for a moment, then gathered her things and quickly rushed away. It was only a matter of time before he got there, really, and she had a glimmer of hope that it would not be long enough for her to escape. Shaking off the feeling Ruth allowed herself to get lost in a crowd… even if he had come for her, there was no way he could find her in this group. He shouldn't. They can't just rush into things, even if they had the same feelings for each other, it was not a possibility. Part of her still just wanted to stay, but she knew that it would only put both of them in more danger. She decided to make one last stop though; the house she once imagined herself living in, never alone, always with Harry. It was only a few blocks from where she made the call to him, so she did not have to travel far.

Entering the house Ruth was inundated with regret. This was her chance to be with Harry. To finally get rid of previous interferences… She bent down near the fireplace, imagining what it would have been like to feel the warmth it gave on a cold winters day, with nothing to do but nuzzle up to the man she loves. Thinking of him brought an aching in her stomach. The thought that she may never see him again, or at least not in the near future brought her pain.

Sensing a pair of eyes on her she jumped slowly glancing behind her, instantly she recognized the impossible silhouette of the man she loved. The man she still loves. Harry.

Stammering she managed to say "Harry, how did you?"

"You honestly don't think I know you well enough to know you would stop here?" He replied playfully. "Now are you going to gape at me forever or come give me a proper welcoming into our home?"

"It's not our-"

"Oh, but we can pretend for only a short while, can we not?"

"But Harry, you have to get back to the office, they will wonder where you are."

"Oh, you stubborn mule!" He said walking toward her. He grabbed her hand and began thumbing across the soft surface.

She looked into his longing, aching eyes and went weak in the knees.

"Harry, I think I" Cupping his face in her hands, "No, I am sure… that I am madly in love with you."

"And I think that I" grabbing her around the waist with his free arm, "am madly in love with you."

The hands that had loosely been holing each other entwined as Harry brought his face down to Ruth's, kissing her with just enough tenderness and passion.

"I put in my two weeks, it has been a long wait but I think it is finally time for us." Harry whispered into Ruth's ear.

"But, we can't just run off. It would be dangerous."

"Ruth, I cannot lose you again. Twice now I have suffered the loss of you, twice I have felt the immense amount of grief that follows losing the woman you love. Twice I have felt my stomach bottom out because of the fear of never seeing you again. Maybe I am being selfish, but I will not go through that again. I will not lose you, I will not part ways, I will not say goodbye… I refuse to. I will not resign to logic, for once in my life I will follow my heart."

Harry could not ignore the tears rolling down Ruth's cheeks, "What is it? Have I said the wrong thing?"

"No, Harry, you said the honest thing, and it was beautiful. The last time we had a conversation similar to this one I felt that you may have been hiding something from me, and you were. Now I know you, there are some things that I don't know about you, and I probably will never know everything… but I am okay with that now. I wasn't then," she said drawing circles on his hand "but I know now that it is impossible to expect to know everything about you. It is unfair for me to expect of you what I would not expect of myself."

"Sometimes it is acceptable to be a bit selfish, Ruth." Harry said bending down to place another passionate kiss on her mouth. The corners of her mouth turned upward as they continued the embrace.


End file.
